I like myself.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
I think I may have grown up this summer. So much has changed. What I believe about myself and how I think and what I know. Things are clicking in a way they never have. I think I finally did it. I grew up. I figured it out. I'm ready to face the world in a new way.
Monday, July 18, 2011
So I think I'm finally going to start using this thing.
Last night, for the first time ever, I was broken up with. I know I'm probably supposed to say, "we broke up" or "things just didn't work out". But lets be honest, I was broken up with. It was the whole "I'm not ready to be in a relationship, don't know if I even WANT to be in one" thing. He told me I was awesome and perfect and listed all of the reasons why, but that he just didn't think he should be in a relationship. So this is a new feeling for me. I mean, there's no guilt, because I didn't do anything. I'm not really mad. More annoyed than anything.
Ever seen the Holiday? I'm like the blonde who can't cry. She's got her emotions all stuffed up inside and can't get them out. She's got an emotional block, and it's not like she's doing it on purpose, she just can't cry. She tries and tries but it doesn't work. I'm sort of like her. I cry sometimes. Usually just when Duke loses. But not over real stuff. So I've decided to try and get a tear or two out, ya know opening the floodgates. Gotta try and get the emotions flowing. My plan so far is to watch a series of depressing movies. The list so far has: Stepmom, The Notebook, Marley and Me, Old Yeller, and My Sisters Keeper. But that's just the list for now. It's a work in progress. I heard chocolate helps, so I'm probably going to hit up Target's candy isle. Probably drown my sorrows in some sappy love songs in between movies. I don't have any pictures of him to burn, so I can't have a boyfriend bonfire... I saw it on Friends once, and it looked pretty therapeutic. Oh well. I'll figure something else out.
Who knows. Either way, I'm just lucky to have amazing friends to help me deal. Even if I don't handle things like a normal person would, they still put up with me. And most of them don't just throw out the classic "you deserve better" line. They're actually invested in my life and that's awesome. For real though, who can be upset over a simple break up with friends as great as mine. Cheesy, but true. They're awesome.
Sidenote: I've been listening to Mulan all day.