Sorry about the times I've called you by your first names because I knew you didn't like it. Just had to get that off my chest. I just wanted to thank you for teaching me to do the laundry. Over and over again. Even though I didn't listen the first 15 or so times. Thanks for continuing to do my laundry when I didn't know how (because I wouldn't let you teach me, so that I would never have to do it). But most of all, thanks for finally sending me an email with pictures and ridiculous amounts of detail so that I couldn't ever say I didn't know how, or that our washing machine was really confusing. Because Now I love to do laundry. I'm doing laundry right now.
Also, thanks for responding to my ridiculous notes that I leave about how I'm certain our house is haunted, or that there are mysterious noises coming from the dishwasher or that I think the air-freshener dispenser thing is spewing toxins. You're the best. I love you.
Your second daughter,
----Not related to my parents or a letter at all----
Sometimes I have a thought and I mold it into some sort of powerful statement or even an understated stance on something, but almost all of the time it's something that might offend some people. So I always try and change it to be more politically correct. And usually by the end of that, it's not what I wanted to say at all. But I'm just terrified to offend anyone. I feel like anything you say in this technological world will stick with you way past when you want it to. It can be used against you. I don't ever want to regret something I say. But sometimes, I really just want to say whatever I want, just to get people to think. And not even just that, but to see if maybe someone else out there thinks the same thing. Who knows.